Posts Tagged Mother’s Day

Being a Mom Doesn’t Make Me More Worthy of Appreciation

I became a mom nearly 17 months ago and it has drastically changed my life. Sometimes I feel like I’ve been doing this for years…like I can’t remember what life was like before Jaylen. Other times, I feel inadequate for this task of raising a young person. Before I became a mom, I always used to write my mom cards about how much I appreciated the things she did for me and sacrifices she made (like taking me to horseback riding lessons even though she was allergic to horses). I never really fully understood the depth of the sacrifices my mother made for me until I had my son. I loved this list I saw on Facebook a month or so ago (taken from a HuffPost article):

10 Things Your Mom Never Told You

 

As I read this list, I got a little teary because all of these things are true for me (except maybe #2 because we don’t let Jaylen eat pie, but I know this will be true later in life). It’s not always easy or fun, but I would do it all over again.

However, as much as I love being “mama” to someone, my identity is not dependent on whether or not I’m a good mom. I know Mother’s Day can be challenging for many women–those who struggle with infertility or who have suffered the pain of miscarriage or even abortion. Being a mom can be hard work, but it doesn’t make moms any more important than any other woman. We are all valuable and loved not because of who we are, but because of Whose we are.

I think this quote from Ann Voskamp explains this well.

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So this Mother’s Day, yes, let’s all appreciate our moms for the sacrifices they’ve made–for essentially giving their own lives (their time, their desires, etc.) for ours. But let’s also remember to love and honor all women today as well because we can all be like a mother to someone whether we have our own children or not. We all can find our worth in the love of our Heavenly Father. Because of the sacrifice of Jesus Christ, He declares us worthy.

If you want a reminder of this, check out this video from Rachelle Dekker‘s site, becauseiamlove.com and share your own story! {Disclaimer: I am the publicist for Rachelle’s upcoming novel, The Choosing, but I LOVE this message and would promote it even if I wasn’t her publicist!}

 

And Happy Mother’s Day to my wonderful mom! 🙂

My sister, my mom, & me at our church's Mother/Daughter tea

My sister, my mom, & me at our church’s Mother/Daughter tea

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My First Mother’s Day

My mom & me when I was 5 months old. 5.13.85 - almost exactly 29 years before Jaylen turns 5 months

My mom & me when I was 5 months old. 5.13.85 – almost exactly 29 years before Jaylen turns 5 months

Today is my first mother’s day holding my baby in my arms. Last year I was in my first trimester and hadn’t told anyone except our families that I was pregnant. It was like my little secret when they passed out Mother’s Day gifts during church service. I’ve always appreciated my mom, but now that I’m a mother myself, I have gained a greater appreciation and understanding of a mother’s love.

The other night as I held Jaylen before putting him to bed, I was overwhelmed by my love for him. I would do anything for him. I don’t want to see him get hurt–physically or emotionally–ever (though realistically I know this won’t ever happen…especially the part about not wanting a boy to get physically hurt). I hope I die before him because I never want to lose him. I would give my life for him. As much as he may frustrate me sometimes with his constant night wakings and his sometimes endless need to be held, I love my son. It’s not because of anything he did; it’s just because he’s my son. How true that statement is about God’s love for us too. He loves us not because of anything we’ve done–just because we’re his children. (I heard that through a Visionary Parenting sermon we listened to last weekend).

So I realize how much it must hurt my parents when I’m hurting. They probably cheered when I learned how to roll over just like we did for Jaylen. And they probably welled up with pride (and a little sadness) when they saw me graduate from college and when I got a job. They sacrificed their time, energy, money, and desires for me just like I’m finding I need to do for my own child.

A mother’s job is never done. I see how much my mom still shows her love for me in the ways she shows her love for her grandson.

Recreating the pic my mom took with me at 5 months. Here's Jaylen just a few days shy of 5 months old.

Recreating the pic my mom took with me at 5 months. Here’s Jaylen just a few days shy of 5 months old.

We’ve never had to buy diapers yet (and Jaylen will be 5 months old tomorrow) because my mom buys them in bulk from Sam’s Club before we run out. She provides babysitting and meals for us often. She encouraged me to stick through the tough parts of breastfeeding because she did it with my siblings and me and knows it’s worth the effort. She takes Chloe, our pug, out for us and even lets her stay at her house for days at a time. She prays for me and my family. Even though she doesn’t have to parent me anymore, my mom will always be my mother. Mom, I love you, and I’m continuing to learn from your example. Thank you for being my mom!

Now this Mother’s Day is extra special because I have my own little boy. He may not call me “mom” yet, but I love being his favorite

person (probably mostly because I’m his food source). I love seeing his eyes follow me as I walk across the room and to see his face light up with a smile when he sees me (even on FaceTime). I love snuggling with him and when he falls asleep on my shoulder. I love knowing that I’m the only one who can really soothe him when he’s super angry. I love seeing him master new skills and discover the world around him. It can be hard amid the sleepless nights, spit-up everywhere, messy house, and days where it seems like nothing really gets done, but I believe it will all be worth it. I pray that the result will be a respectful, godly young man who loves the Lord and lives to honor Him.

Happy Mother’s Day to all the moms out there!

I leave you with a few great quotes from Surprised by Motherhood by Lisa-Jo Baker.

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And this one is a plaque I saw and I just loved it. 🙂

StrengthofmyLove

 

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